Senshi Practical Jokes
by Mystra32
Summary: Set in the Silver Millennium, Venus plays a joke on Mars with unfortunate results. General Sailor Moon world, but more stress on PGSM personalities.


**Author's Note**: You all know the drill, I own nothing. This is set in the Silver Millennium with the personalities from PGSM as I envision they might be. Its a one shot I wrote while home sick and bored. I purposely left out what Mars does to Venus because I think its funnier to leave that part open ended rather than giving you exactly what I would envision, and frankly that vision keeps changing. Enjoy!

"V-chan, I hate to say this, but I think this is your stupidest idea yet."

The young Venusian princess scowled at her Jovian compatriot at the other end of the mattress they were carrying. "If you think it's stupid, then why are you helping? I could have come up with a way to move this without listening to your degrading commentary had I known you weren't interested."

The princess of Jupiter sighed at her friend's reaction and turned to her Mercurian companion for help, "She won't listen to me when she's like this. You try to talk some sense into our oh so glorious leader."

The Venusian only scowled further and turned her attention to the Mercurian who was helping carry her side of the mattress, "Well?"

"W-well Venus," she started in light of the Venusian's steely gaze. "I wouldn't call it a stupid plan per say, its just I don't know how wise it is to actually follow through with it. Mars," she tilted her head to indicate the young woman sleeping on the mattress, "is already going to wake up with a severe headache from the sleeping potion you slipped into her drink, but you know she hates large bodies of water. She's going to be furious when she wakes up. Also, she **will** know it was you. No one else in the palace, except possibly Serenity, would dream of pulling a stunt like this with her."

"So we make it look like Serenity's idea then," the blond said offhandedly. "Mars can't stay mad at her and your right, she would think it was a great idea." She suddenly smiled at her companions, "And even if she doesn't believe a word of it, I can always call it training."

The other two stared at her in disbelief before the Jovian finally regained her ability to speak, and asked in a concerned voice, "And just how will you do that?"

"I'm forcing her to move out of her comfort zone and work through unexpected situations," the Venusian nodded sagely as she made this pronouncement. "As my second in command she needs training like this to help her mature as a warrior."

"...I see," the Jovian said, feeling a little ill at her leader's obvious abuse of power. "In that case we were ordered to help you."

The Venusian looked over startled, "Huh?"

"I completely agree with Jupiter. You coerced us to help you, and that way Mars can get a more one on one training session with you."

"What?" the Venusian said in a rising panic.

"Venus, she'll never believe that Serenity hatched this harebrained plot on her own, and she will come after us when she gets out of the lake. She's a Martian after all, and you know how they are about debts," the Jovian began very seriously.

"Yes, remember the time you 'fixed' Mars' room when we were little? She was so mad, but at the time she just grumbled a lot, and then three months later she 'fixed' your bed," the Mercurian agreed.

The Venusian shuddered at the memory. "I still don't know what she did with my original bed or even how she managed to remove it so quickly, and that pallet was the most uncomfortable thing I've ever slept on. Still," she said with a more thoughtful look, "I don't think it really compared to the way I brightened her room. All I had to do to get my bed back was invade her room for a week, while she on the other hand is still finding remnants of my work."

Jupiter rolled her eyes at the response, "That's because your still putting them there."

"Your point?" the Venusian asked.

Both laughed a little at this, but the Mercurian shook her head. "No Venus, that's not really what we mean. After all this time she knows its not worth it to try to beat you at your own game, so I suspect she'll take more drastic measures to get back at you."

"She can try," the blond said with a dismissive flip of her hair, "but there is really only so much she can do to a fellow princess."

"Give it up Mercury," the Jovian said with a sigh. "Her head has become to overinflated to listen to sense. All we can do at this point is ensure our poor friend here doesn't drown in her sleep and start work on fireproofing our own rooms."

The three reached the lake and lowered the mattress to the ground where Mercury began to inscribe runes on its sides. As soon as she finished, the Jovian and Venusian shoved it out into the water to float away. They stared at the sight for a little while before the Mercurian spoke. "Just how much of that stuff did you give her anyway?"

"Not to much," the Venusian responded with a proud grin. "I heard that an overdose can make a person sleep forever, so I made sure to give her no more than three drops of it."

"Probably a good idea," the Jovian agreed, but their Mercurian friend stared at her in horror.

"Three drops? You only gave a Martian three drops!" she shrilled in panic. Mercury turned to grab the Jovian's hand and began to run pulling her along. "Quick! We have to get out of here! She could wake up any minute!"

"What! What do you mean?" the Jovian said stopping her friend's forward momentum.

"Three drops is only enough to put a normal person under for a few hours, but for a Martian its usually less. Add to that, Venus waited an hour to get us, and we've been carrying her for almost an hour ourselves. She..." the Mercurian trailed off as she stared at the lake behind her two friends. She suddenly brought a hand to her mouth and pointed behind them before shouting, "She's awake! Run!"

Taking her own advice she turned and darted into the trees as her friends looked back at the lake.

With great alarm they saw the Martian sitting up and beginning to transform. Jupiter proceeded to pat Venus on the shoulder saying, "Its been nice knowing you, and I'm fairly certain she can jump that distance transformed." After which she followed Mercury's example and ran for the woods with all her might.

Venus watched Jupiter and Mercury disappear into the trees in shock before sparing one last glance at the floating mattress. The sight of Sailor Mars aiming her flame sniper at her also sent the Venusian running for the woods. She never made it, and instead found herself jumping back away from the trees cover with a series of yelps as several flaming arrows exploded on the ground in front of her.

"Venus, come on! Open the door," Jupiter hollered as she pounded on the Venusian's door. "This is ridiculous! You've been cooped up there all week. I don't care what Mars did to you we have duties and I'm tired of covering for you. Get out here so Mercury can at least try to fix it."

"No! I can't be seen like this. If its such a problem for you just have that hot headed pyromaniac cover my shifts. Tell her its an order so I can at least have some vengeance for this confinement I have to suffer!" the Venusian shouted back through the door.

"Venus," Mercury petitioned, "at least let me look to make sure there is no permanent damage. This was Mars' handiwork so it could leave scars if not treated properly."

There was a gasp and the door burst open as Venus burs out and grabbed her Mercurian friend roughly, "Don't you dare tell me this is permanent just because she did it!" the Venusian demanded. "Yes her fire is weird, but I refuse to believe she can permanently burn the hair off someone's face if she didn't burn their skin, a-and we're friends right? Sh- she knew what I did was only a joke, right? So she wouldn't do something like that to my face would she? Well? Would she?" Venus went on sounding more desperate with each word.

Her concerned friends stared at her in shock until Mercury hesitantly brought her hand up to touch the Venusian's face where her eyebrows should be only to find the skin bare of all but a small stubble just beginning to break the surface.

"Snerk," the sound barley passed the Mercurian's lips before her Jovian companion began to crumple in fits of hysterical laughter.

"Ha-ha. Y-you, *gasp* you have, haha, n-no eyebrows o-or, haha, eyelashes! Hahaha," Jupiter crowed.

"Hem," Mercury cleared her through trying to stifle her own laughter in the face of her leader's distress. "If that's all she did to you, no it should be fine in a month or so."

"A month!" Venus shrieked. "I am not staying cooped up for a month! This is to far," she said with a stomp of her foot, "if I have to suffer that long she is going to suffer right along with me," she continued resolutely and marched down the corridor to accost her second in command for her transgression.

"Alright, I understand why Venus is missing her eyebrows and eyelashes," the young princess of the Moon said with a grin at her Senshi of Jupiter and Mercury, "but what I don't understand is why that means both she and Mars have pink and purple hair."

Jupiter smiled into her tea at the memory and replied to Serenity's query with a simple, "Venus decided that misery loves company, and made sure she would have appropriate company."

"Yes, but why is her head a neon patchwork and not just Mars'?" the princess pressed.

The Mercurian sighed as she lowered her cup and began to explain, "Venus used a set of dyes from her home planet that takes a month or so to wash out, but when she went into Mars' rooms to put it into her soaps she found her already bathing. Venus, being the patient Venusian she is, decided to make sure the dye sat long enough to take by applying it herself, and Mars, being the understanding Martian she is, returned the favor."


End file.
